Hope

I have a wicked fear of abandonment, and not out of a deep insecurity but because that is what people taught me. That they will leave when it suits them no matter the coast to me.


But I love the phase ‘run with reckless abandon.’ That's it. That's how I want to live. I want to run at life with reckless abandon. I want to arrive to my death in love with life and have lived it as best I could. I want to have lived so bravely and freely that when my kids ask me what was it like to be their age I can tell them. So maybe I’ll struggle to tell them about the younger years, but these years; the ones where I found true lasting freedom. These years will be a grand tail of my many adventures and wilds. 


I want to live wild and free. I was never meant to live in a box. Which seems a rather obvious conclusion but its taken me a long time to understand that. I can’t wait to breath in all the different kinds of air. I can’t wait to be amongst the great wild yonder and taste the very essence of life itself. I can’t wait. I’m too excited to be apathetic any longer. I’m gonna take on this life and see what it’s willing to give me. 


Because there’s always more that this life is willing to give us. All we most do is be willing to reach out and take it. Theres so much more to live for and to live in. Life is such a bigger and longer word than we think. 


I never truly understood my name. It’s unique for sure but I never understood why I was named the way I was. It just didn’t make sense, I’m kinda a boring person. I like my one kind of tea and love potatoes. I know not very exciting. But my name speaks to the promise of adventures to be yet lived. I never understood my name but on that morning. That Friday morning in early March full of sunshine and fresh wind I finally understood why my mother gave me the name Hope. 

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