Falling in love

I used to want to be in love. I thought life began when you fell in love, not that I would have ever admitted to that. Believed the mark of a women was a broken heart. I desperately wanted to understand infatuation, I thought it would get me somewhere faster. 


Oh how wrong I was. 


I’ve never fallen in love. Not in anyway that would really count. But I’m falling in love with each breath I take. I now know life begins much sooner than you remember. 


It begins that first time you hear your loved ones voice. It begins that first time you fall down but get back up. It begins the very first time you see something beautiful. Life begins the first time you look in the mirror and see yourself; not who you wish you were, or who you think you need to be, but yourself.


I used to want to be in love. I was told so many times that that would be the moment. The highlight of my life. So many different people from different walks all told me the same thing, just wait till you fall in love. 


They were so wrong. But they were so right. 


Life doesn’t begin the moment you fall in love with a boy from your hometown. And it doesn’t end the day your heart breaks. There’s still much to see once you’ve run off into the sunset and more the day you choose to walk away from it. 


They were so very wrong. But they were so right and they didn’t even have a clue. Because the thing is the day your life beings is the day you meet love the person. Everyday before that moment is the demo version, it’s the part of the journey before you have the real tools, its before you’re able to slay the dragon. 


I used to want to be in love. I just didn’t know what I meant. Love looks nothing like I would have thought. Just wait till you fall in love. They didn’t even know what they were saying. They didn’t mean it the way that it really matters. 


I used to want to be in love. If anything I just wanted to fall in love so I could write epic stories about the heart break. But now I know. I know what love really is and what it feels like to be in it. And it’s probably not what you’re expecting. I'm falling in love with living.


I used to want to be in love.

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