Time and Light Switches

When I was around 9 years old I joined my elementary school choir. It’s something I often forget. Really I ought to not be so surprised seeing as though I’ve tried every form of art I could get my hands on. In the time I spent with the choir I learned how to properly breath when singing. Meaning, how to breath quickly and sharply so as to not impede the rhythm and sound of the song.   I’ve carried that skill though life all the way to nearly 21 years old. It’s something that’s become less of a skill and more of a habit; and not just when singing. I breath fast, like someone will come along and snatch the air away if I don’t take my fill quickly. It’s not healthy. I joined the choir because the few friends I had joined. I didn’t know what I was doing I was 9. Wasn’t even double digits, but man did I not want to be alone. So I joined the choir and I enjoyed my time there, it just didn’t have that pull of passion for me. But I stored that knowledge in the back with the dingy filin...

The morning was grey, the world was still covered head to toe in rain water and the clouds had not yet lifted. But my brother stood happily, gleefully washing the farm truck. My same brother had made bread the day before and it was that I sat eating for breakfast.   I was sad that morning. I felt somewhat alone and didn’t really want to be. But it didn’t last. Because I had bread. Because I turned on the string lights that hung over the window, simply because I could. And because I could see my brother out the window dancing to music that only he heard.  I was sad and that was okay, but I choose hope.  I would like to say it was easy alas like many things it was not. It took effort and will power. To say, ‘I’m sad, and that’s okay, but I’d like to feel something different. I’d like today to be better than that.’  It happened slowly and I suppose, to someone else, it may have looked like the fog drifting away. And the sun coming out to play.  You see ho...

The way the light glitters on the water looks like static on the tv. Light bouncing off the snow can blind in one glance. All water shines. It reflects all His beauty back to Him.   And even after the cliff falls into the ocean the trees continue to grow. They don’t back away from the edge, they grow right up to it and then over. The trees do not fear the fall.  And the clouds do not design to be anywhere other than the sky. Although sometimes they cry. They let go and come crashing into our tiny meaningful lives.  The ocean is a mirror, and the trees are fearless, and the clouds have a humanness. It all screams of a designer. And humans were not meant to be anywhere but Here, they were the missing piece, the finishing touch, the final bow.  But it’s not all over so quickly. The water is not always still. And the trees bend in the wind. And the clouds can be grey. And humans don’t always mean what they say.  The sea has taught me many things, the most ...

I used to want to be in love. I thought life began when you fell in love, not that I would have ever admitted to that. Believed the mark of a women was a broken heart. I desperately wanted to understand infatuation, I thought it would get me somewhere faster.   Oh how wrong I was.  I’ve never fallen in love. Not in anyway that would really count. But I’m falling in love with each breath I take. I now know life begins much sooner than you remember.  It begins that first time you hear your loved ones voice. It begins that first time you fall down but get back up. It begins the very first time you see something beautiful. Life begins the first time you look in the mirror and see yourself; not who you wish you were, or who you think you need to be, but yourself. I used to want to be in love. I was told so many times that that would be the moment. The highlight of my life. So many different people from different walks all told me the same thing, just wait till you fal...